Wednesday :)

   I love my therapist, she says the simplest things that make so much sense.  OK she said one of the first things to do when you want to beat or wave off depression is smile. The more we smile, the more positive we become, that in turns gives off positive energy.  A smile can change ones life if you look at in a full circle type of way.  I understand the smile more things and it takes more muscles to frown then to smile.  I also get sometimes it is easier said then done.  I at time I have to smile at the things that make me made just in order to stop from crying, now I am trying a different approach, just smile for no reason at all.  I started this and at first I felt crazy, now I feel good  sexy even.  People even smile back most of the time, I am quit sure some people think I am crazy, but I don't care it feels good.  You should try it.

    A very good friend of mine told me be for she passed away " Chriss- Po you need to stop acting as if you do not need help with raising your kids"  now she said this no a norm but no day it clicked.  She was right I did and still do need help even more now that I am sick.  What I did do after I realized I did need help, was get my girlfriends together and we started taking weekends.   Which gave us all two weekends free.  Dam do I miss those weekends and my girls.  Friends are hard to come by, so don't forget to tell them " I love you"

  My doctors have no real idea what is going on with my body and that sucks ass, badly.  It's funny how with all of these tools in the field of mediation the human body is still a mystery.  All I can do is smile. :)

 I am going for now.  TTFN